IP relay services like this one are services that allow deaf, mute, or other telephonically challenged people to make calls. An IP relay operator calls a person and reads text to them, then types responses.
This is obviously inviting abuse, like these NSFW calls (via disjointed.org). A lot are just filthy talk, usually in the first person. I’ve mirrored them locally as mp3s instead of wavs, turning the 85 meg collection into 5 megs in the process. My favorite one: In Da Club.
[Update: Just so we’re clear on this, I found these calls on another site and copied them for my site. I wasn’t involved at all in the production of them, I just thought they were funny.]
[Update 2: I’ve closed comments, but if you’re a relay operator who wants to talk about how bad these are, try this forum]

39 responses to “IP Relay Calls”

  1. Anonymous says:

    That’s too funny. ๐Ÿ™‚

  2. Cameron says:

    Hey, I just want to say FUCK YOU to you guys who are putting up the prank calls. First of all its illegal. Very, I might add. Second, the operators dont really give a shit that youre exploiting them, or using them to harass other people but posting them online. thats low. I am a relay operator, 7166M and I think you guys are fucking fags. I know by posting my # ill just get flamed at work. go ahead, ill disconnect ur faggot ass

  3. –remaining nameless– says:

    just to let you know, i am one of the operators that you have “chose to exploit” and basically what the fuck? are you really that lacking in a social life that you have to call and bug relay operators who are just trying to do their job… and not only call but record and post them to the internet like they’re something hysterically funny that needs to be shared with the world?? i mean really – you say we’re stupid and what not and laugh your ass off at the messages we have to leave… us, we’re just doing our job, you- you’re the one who had to come up with the message in the first place… whos the “loser” now? yea we might have to say whatever the fuck u tell us to say, but at least we’re getting paid good money to do it!! honestly all i have to say is if you get a lawsuit your way don t be surprised, and pls for the sake of humanity – get a fucking life! thx bye now.

  4. jj says:

    this is awsome

  5. Zach says:

    why not exploit you guys, if you say you dont care then why did you take the time to say all that crap?!?!

  6. Jonathan says:

    seriously who really cares if were exploiting you, and you can’t say its not funny, because it is

  7. disgruntled opr says:

    I am a relay opr #7XX5. (I m not stupid enough to put my whole ID nbr on here.) I ve been looking up websites all day on this stuff and I just have to say….. Taking calls from ppl who are abusing the system is a waste of time. I got into this job b/c I truly wanted to help ppl (and it is easy money). Theses jerks who use IP Relay to make crank calls and harass ppl are idiots who don t have a life. How would u like it if someone waked u up out of a nice sleep just to harass u by saying “Hey Baby I wanna fuck ur big cock and stick it in my mouth”?????? I am betting that u wouldn t like it one bit. Well we won t like bothering these ppl by relay a call to them. As for the protocol for prpoer hang up procedures… if ur bugging me and bugging ppl by makipng crank calls… I m gonna hang ur ass up.

  8. Lucas says:

    how do you get a job as an ip relay operator?

  9. Anonymous says:

    im a relay operator and i dont care what i relay. it makes no difference to me. i think some of the calls are funny and others i could do without but what the hell it is america right? and the more sick mother fuckers there are out there, the more job security i have. so i say keep it guys. prank away. ๐Ÿ™‚

  10. sdfhsdjko says:

    hahahahaha…ok explain how this is illegal mr operator

  11. lambizzee says:

    If you people with the operater job really care that much then why do you do it?! It is hella funny when the operater has to repeat whatever you type LOL! I made one operater say, “I am an idiot who says whatever other people type” I also made the operater say “damn” over and over again fifty times and she actualy started laughing. So operators, Take the fucking tampon out of your ass and have a good laugh!

  12. BiteMeRO says:

    This is for the person who wanted to know how it could be illegal to make these calls. This comes from the IP-Relay website.
    “Please be aware that it is a violation of federal law to use your telephone or computer to
    engage in a communication with the intent to annoy, abuse, threaten, or harass any person
    at a number you call. It is also a violation of federal law to use your telephone or computer
    to make an obscene communication to a person under 18 years of age. You may be fined
    or imprisoned for up to two years for making such calls through IP Relay.”
    And yes, we can say it’s not funny…because it’s not. To be funny, something must be original, and believe me when I tell you, you’re only the 10 millionth loser kid to do this who thinks he’s so motherfucking original. Honestly, most of you now are using the service because you heard about it from a lame-ass friend of yours…not because you’re so ingenious as to figure it out yourself. As for the operator who doesn’t seem to care…obviously you haven’t been doing this job long.
    Many of us do this job because we need the money. It’s not something you’d understand as some punk ass kid whose daddy pays for everything.
    None of us think you’re funny. In fact, just about all of us tell our friends about the prankster fag who just got off the phone and talk about how completely limp you must be.
    Oh, by the way, a lot of operators write down prank callers’ numbers. We have a list we circulate amongst ourselves…and I mean all of us…Sprint, MCI, and AT&T operators. And any pissed-off operator is ENCOURAGED to prank you right back and jam your house with a shitstorm of prank calls. And if you’re extra lucky, we may even call your parents and tell them what a sweet little pervert you are and exactly what their adorable little shithead has been doing with the computer that Mommy and Daddy bought them for homework. Of course, after they find that out (and we’ll help of course) they may just check your computer’s history and find all that gay porn you’ve been downloading. That’s a fun day for everybody!!

  13. Anonymous says:

    Wouldn’t that be illegal though…? Personally I think its damn funny.

  14. Anonymous says:

    You know whats HELLA funny when the operator makes u repeat and spell every stupid thing u say…..thats funny u know whats even funnier when u are such a loser that u have nothing better to do than make relay calls all night with ur stupid friends…u know what else is really funny the fact that the messages posted here are being breaking the law by breeching confidentiality which the fcc is really interested in so hope ur site gets shut down u low life bunch of 12 year olds….

  15. Anonymous says:

    i think u guys who make us operators make these prank calls are the mother of all idiots…low life mutherfuckers who have no social life…u fuckers are gonna abuse this to a point where this service will be shut down and i pray that you’re gonna have a deaf kid OR ur mom, dad, brother, sister or YOU will become deaf one day and can’t use this service anymore becuz fuckers like u ๐Ÿ™‚

  16. Spark says:

    To the idiot prank callers:
    Prank calls through Relay are just abuse and therefore, illegal. Grow up, You’ll ruin something that wasn’t even meant for you. Read a book, go outside, or for heavens’ sake go to bed! Do something other than trying to piss off the relay operators. We are trying to help Deaf, Hard of Hearing, or Speech Disabled people communicate. Not the hearing children who think it’s a real laugh to hear an operator say “cock” 64 times.
    Someone upstairs in the government will get pissed off, and they’ll take away your “toy” and you’ll piss off the people who use it legitimately. Selfish. Seriously selfish. You should be ashamed of yourselves.
    Maybe you’ll grow up and realize that you’re a bunch of idiots and you were doing something stupid and illegal.
    I hope people who get pranked through IP try to research and find out what the service is truly for.

  17. relaymadman says:

    i’m a relay operator and i think this shit is funny i could care less what people use it for. the only thing that i ask is if you’re going to use it to prank someone… please be creative, i’m tired to death of just saying cock balls shit fuck ass or random pornographic sentences. be clever.

  18. boober says:

    How do I get an I-P relay job?

  19. annonymous says:

    relay online is a biz that is there to assist deaf and hard of hearing people in the world and u retards are keeping those people who need this service waiting, not that it would matter to you because u are too socially backward to give a fuck about anyone but yourselves. grow up and pls pull ur head out of ur ass .. that has to be uncomfortable! .. and halleluja to the opr that wants something original to say how intelligent do you have to be to string random dirty words together? can u put a sentence together? doubt it .. and pleasssssseeee learn how to properly use the relay if you are going to run with this immature redundancy!!! (that means childish nonsense!!) i know you dont have much for vocabulary. have a nice day

  20. Juan Capella says:

    lol .. I still remember when I called FBI, NASA and other shits. fucking good ๐Ÿ™‚

  21. Gregory says:

    I used to use IP relay to call in sick for school! Haha, so much easier than getting a parent to do it.

  22. Goober says:

    Haha! This thread is great! I’m sure the FCC is interested in in operators sharing the personal information of service users!

  23. 97G629er says:

    I’m a relay opr (#97G629er) and this whole discussion is immature. Do you other operators really think you are making one bit of difference by expending your effort here? This web-site is probabbly run by some punk ass twelve-year-old with a tiny penis! Why the hell am I typing? I wish i never got that forwarded email. This makes me sad.

  24. I’m glad you operators don’t think this is funny! I’d hate to accidentily amuse y’all when all i am only trying to amuse is myself. And the uses i find!
    Sometimes, i’m just lazy, and i have you call movie-time hotlines, instead of going to movietimes.com Why would a deaf-old-lady care about movie times? unless there are subtitles… but movies with sub-titles suck! Whoohoo!! ROck on relay ops!

  25. cw says:

    I think this is awesome. These things are fucking hillarious. I love it that you guys actually have to do this go that is funny. imagine having a lame ass job that also required you to talk dirty to morons on the other end of the phone, and not being able to stop. That is much better then begin a garbage man or working at mcdonalds.
    this article really insipred me to try this out. god imagine having a sucker who has to stay on the hook and do what you say. that is like having a slave, man this is gonna be sweet.
    hey can the site admin post some info on how we actually make these calls?

  26. Canadianeh! says:

    well you ip relay ppl should expect this kind of thing so fuckin deal with it if you have a problem here is an easy solution quit! if i had that job i think it would be funny. so stop bieng little bia’s!! and do ur job hahaha

  27. Anonymous says:

    im still confused on how ip-relay deals with the pranks calls. has anyone actually been imprisoned cause of it? i’d laugh my ass if someone actually went to jail for being an immature little sickass, prank calling people.

  28. Anonymous says:

    To the IP-relay ops who dont give shit, your cool. The fuckin whiners, fuck you. You think your gonna change the fuckin world? Get a sense of humor. Some of you even sound like anal retentive bastards in your typing. I would love it if I had a boring ass job like you and every now and then the monotony was broken up by somebody making a funny call. Prank calls are funny. PERIOD. If you dont think so you probably dont have many friends, or you and all your friends are losers who aren’t worth the minute I spent typing this.

  29. Anonymous says:

    Relay Madman, your cool. 97G629er, why you thinkin of little boys cocks?

  30. Anonymous says:

    To the operators who are so upset about this: get over it. You get paid no matter what you say… why do you care? You should be happy the federal government pays the phone company to keep you employed (that’s the real travesty, that tax dollars pay for this service.)
    And to anyone who says this is illegal: It’s only illegal to make prank calls with the intent to annoy or harass. If you’re doing this to your own answering machine, you’re friend’s answering machine who thinks its funny, etc, you’re in the clear. Or if you’re using it to call in sick to school you’re in the clear. So have fun!

  31. relayOP says:

    I’m a relay operator too. I dont think it is very funny and i do think that people who do it have no life. but i get paid so what the hell. like someone else said just be original.

  32. cheese says:

    i don’t know which site this came from, but i’ve been looking up sites about other ip relay operators and stumbled onto this… if anybody knows a site where relay operators can converse, pls let me know ๐Ÿ™‚

  33. justiceRO says:

    ha ha ha man i know back when i was 15 16 17 i was out partying on a sat night definetly not sitting at home getting my rocks off to someother person say homoerotic, homophobic, racist nonsense. As an RO i find these calls the dullest and most routine thing, call comes in “XXX XXX XXXX” (sometimes they forget the area code and i have to type (ro here area code pls) ga while thinking (ro here dumbass pranker learn to use the svc if you re going to make my life hell)sksk then they give me an area code) and every ro here will notice what else is missing then either prompt them for the missing parts or just OD them, and once we finally get to a person who doesn t think it s immature and ignorant (least we say just plain retarded) then we say every obsenety in the book and occasionally try to butcher their words through their own misspellings such as douse or dooche, etc… then after the voice person finally gets bored or one person screws up and gives a chance to get a supervisor and get rid of them, then on to the next round unless we get blessed with state relay or the blessing that cld be a curse for those of us that work a shift where no relief is possible and get an AOHELL or T Mobile call

  34. CA NO, FUCK _YOU_ says:

    To the twat who said “get a sense of humor”, I reply: BE FUNNY, goddamnit! And THEN I will laugh. But you are never funny, ever.
    To those who say prank relay calls are “funny”, I reply: Yeah, if and only if you are 12 years old OR have an IQ of

  35. j says:

    Wanna hear something really funny? On Friday, Dec 17 th 2004 a deaf woman was put on hold because the relay center where I work was flooded with calls which like on any given Fri. night were 90% prank calls. Well this woman was put on hold for 5 minutes when an opr could finally answer her call she asked the operator (ME)to call 911. Her husband was having a heart attack and I stayed on the line with her as she gave the 911 opr all of her information until the paramedics arrived. Well her husband died. A week before Christmas this lady lost her husband and her children lost their dad. Had the paramedics been informed 5 mins earlier could he have lived? I don’t know but it’s something you punks should think about. Imagine your Dad laying on the ground having a heart attack and your mother being unable to call 911 because some 15 year old kid is calling himself having the opr read him 50 cent lyrics. Merry Christmas. – A Relay Opr

  36. a says:

    holy shit…that true? Damn. If that stuff happens, the crank phone calls should really stop.

  37. Anonymous says:

    regarding the deaf lady who got put on hold. ip-relay is slow to begin with, she shoulda called 911 – they come no matter if anyone says anything to the 911op or not. thatd be a lot faster than going through sloooow iprelay and typing your long ass address.

  38. IP Relay calls at OpenPodcast.org

    Well, this isn’t Podcasting for Cats, but it might be Podcasting for Five-Year-Olds.

  39. yonderboy says:

    Yeah, umm, not funny, here’s why:
    Americans with Disabilities Act of 1996
    47 C.F.R. ร‚ยง 64.604 2(i)
    Except as authorized by section 705 of the Communications Act, 47 U.S.C. 605, CAs are prohibited from disclosing the content of any relayed conversation regardless of content, and with a limited exception for STS CAs, from keeping records of the content of any conversation beyond the duration of a call, even if to do so would be inconsistent with state or local law.
    What’s funny is when websites get pulled down for this type of violation…it’s happened before.

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